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The Year of the Underdog - Week 1 - 01/05/24

Okay, so the title lies, it's not actually the 5th, but for the record I intended to have this done, I just got super busy ( I know, I know) but the year is officially underway and I wasn't nearly as prepared as I had hoped. I put most of my focus and drive into ending last year with NO unresolved situations, and with a plan for any situations/people that were coming with me in the New Year.

I had intended to step into this year with a filled out day planner, a financial plan, a schedule that allowed time for each life compartment for me, a healthy routine for Zabrina, and my Squad figured out. I was on the right track until my car decided to start puking costly repairs, 2 people who (I thought) held crowns out right disrespected my new found core values, and a wave of depression came hand in hand with familiar insecurities I've battled since I was a pre-teen, all decided to take center stage all at once.

But the good news? I did enough clean up and preparation last year that the blow I just endured isn't crippling, it's just stung hella bad. I'm learning to feel the impact and then to turn that pain into power.

Last year I rushed to put together an end of the year wrap up video that outlines my new ranking system and what actions or repeat behaviors would move those ranks in the upcoming year. Only 2 people reached out with their concerns or to explain that they understood where I was coming from and wanted to make amends, much love and respect to those 2, thank you

for understanding that even though I forgive with all my heart, this year I can't afford to spend any time questioning other peoples loyalties, nor can I risk just putting faith in situations that I'm not 100% sure will align with my core values or add to The woman I'm becoming or the future I'm building. I'm sure with time our ships will sail in the same direction, I just no longer neglect my ship attempting to fix ours. My decision to distance myself is no reflection of where I hope to sail along side you, it has everything to do with me navigating the direction of my personal ship.

To anybody harboring questions, concerns or thoughts but are afraid to talk to me, DONT BE. I'm a safe place for everyone, even if we've had stormy waters, I'm always willing to come to the conversation open minded and open hearted, as long as that same respect is reciprocated. However, if you don't reach out... the situation will be left dead because I gave my attempts to bring to light situations that were draining my cups with no good purpose and even offered genuine apologies in areas that I had to eat a slice of humble pie and admit I was at fault. These attempts do not equate to continued disrespect being tolerated.

With that being said... it's time to move along to the upcoming year and the goals we're about to smash.

I've started using the Me+ app regularly - This is such a helpful tool in making sure I stay on track with the goals of all my life compartments. I intended to have all the daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly and yearly goals added before the start of the year, however that didn't happen so we're winging it. As I develop a balanced routine I add the tasks, and as the tasks get added I make sure they are done.

I've begun using Ketones again!!! This is a supplement with a whole bunch of scientific stuff I don't know or care to remember as I'm not selling it. I tried it for 2 months last year and the results were SO evident. The energy boost and the overall feeling of not dragging ass was the biggest result and the weight loss just came in as a bonus! These are going to be necessary to the Glow Up.

I started the TLS protein shakes (kind of) - This requires a better morning schedule, as right now my mornings usually consist of me sleeping past my alarm, rushing to get ready and then either dropping Zabrina off as the bell rings OR in me barely making my appointments on time... THIS is a work in progress and though I'm FAR better than I was about it than last year, we've still got some work to do.

I weighed in and took all measurements at the beginning of the year! I created a tracker in my digital day planner on my ipad and at the very least intend to keep track... I'm hoping to get into a good routine of blogging weekly (52 weeks, 52 blogs, 52 lbs) and keeping an ongoing record of the progress (and lack of) in the physical fitness world.

I started journaling again! Not just working on future blogs that will be released but I have the following journals that I have kept up to date since January 1st and intend to make 365 entries in each one. With everything else going on, sometimes I have to let these slide and play make up a day or two later but I take so many pictures and videos (Yay for being an upcoming social media influencer!) that it's pretty easy to scroll back and see what happened each day, but I refuse to get more than a week behind.

I'm paying more attention to the work tasks that I have, although my job requires a ton of unpaid time to get everything done in a timely manner, I'm learning to navigate different techniques and tools (like start visit reports for transport cases AT the drop off) and making sure I at least check my email box daily. This is also a work in progress.. with all the notifications I receive for my main job, from my social medias, from friends and family I tend to get overwhelmed and instead of putting my big girl panties on and handling it, I turn off notifications. Hence why a prioritized ranking system for people and tasks in my life had to be developed.

Self care has moved to the top of the list. I'm spending more time reading, listening to audiobooks, taking baths, keeping up with personal hygiene tasks (shaving legs suckssss), crocheting and even watching some shows. This is new to me... I'm so used to everything coming before these activities.. when I put off answering messages or cut conversations short because I haven't tended to my basic well being needs, I sometimes feel a high level of guilt. But I'm working on that THIS is a huge step for me, but I only get 1 shot at this and I can't miss more than I already do because Zabrina deserves me there. Mommy and Me dates are a must and will continue to take priority.

So if you've made it this far... understand ... this is JUST the beginning. In order to build the life I dream of, and that Zabrina deserves, there is SO much I have to catch up, clean up, and progress on.... and even though I know it's going to be hard and I'm terrified I'll fail..... I'm pretty fucking proud of myself for making it this far!!

Until next time.... *Stay Humble, Stay Hydrated*

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