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Fat Girl Friday Birthday Slim Down - Week 6 - 06/02/2023

. Fat Girl Friday Update:

Starting Weight: 312 (April 28th weight in)

Last Week's Weight: 303.7

This Week's Weight Goal: 287

Thie Week's Actual Weight: 308.8

Week's Weight Difference: +5.1

Birthday Slim Down Weight Difference: -3.2

Mental Health: I feel great! Even when I don't, I'm still excited to see what's next!

NSV (Non-Scale Victories):

To be 100% honest I'm pretty convinced that I've set my birthday slim down goal too high, and I'm genuinely okay with that. My non scale victories are too many to even begin to type out (especially when I'm fitting these updates in between all of the other activities my life now includes) and if I was in the same position in a month and a half as I am today, I'm already satisfied. However, that won't be the case. Because as I stay consistent and keep pushing past the hard moments, and not beating myself up too bad for not making the best decisions ALL the time, there's literally NO way possible that I won't progress in one or more areas of my life. One thing that I'm learning, is when I'm focused on just one area of my life, the others tend to slack a bit and for the time being that's okay. I'm literally starting from (my) rock bottom and climbing up and have to remember that the climb up isn't going to be an easy one, so I'm learning to consistently give attention to each different compartment of my life (wait for the book for the official life compartments hehe), that way at the very least I'm maintaining a level of stability in each while slowly progressing. Jumping in too fast leads to failed attempts and me throwing in the towel. Some people it works to just go balls to the wall.. not me, I don't have those LOL

This week there were SO many non scale victories so I decided to just compile a list:

  • Went to the park with all the nieces and my brother and sister on Tuesday, I was able to carry my youngest niece around for a little while and still run (okay fat girl hustle XD) to chase after a very sassy Zabrina who didn't want to get in the splash pad.

  • Deep cleaned one of the bathrooms, fully, with the help of my middle niece Layna and Zabrina. (AFTER one of my longer visits)

  • Redesigned Zabrina and my space, including pulling everything we own out, decluttering all areas of the room, Creating a space for Zabrina to call her own and hanging up LED lights.

  • Had a land PT session that was painful in the best of ways (being fat hurts! Especially when you are trying to move your body weight around and build muscle to help burn more fat! It's such a vicious cycle)

  • There was only 1 day this week that I really felt yucky and I slept on and off until 10:00, and then had to rush to get my day started, forgot my Isotonix Women's essentials AND my morning shake and went straight to PT. This was NOT a victory, but the fact the other 6 days were consistent were for sure!

  • I'm still soda free! This has been a bit easier than I imagined because I'm so focused on making sure I'm hydrated to avoid those stupid headaches I don't really have time for soda, which is good because I know once I take the first sip it's like a red-eyed Jasper when Bella cuts finger... NO CONTROL!

Shout Out To The Magician that Made it all Happen!!

There is a magician (Physical Therapist) at my PT establishment named Pat. At first I was weary of him, because he seemed so... to the point.. and I was in such a low mental point when I first met Pat that the words of encouragement and support processed in my head as him being nice because he was paid to be (as with most people in my bully brain's view). But Pat was different. He paid attention. There were times in the beginning stages of recovery that I'd lie my face off saying my pain level was significantly higher than it really was, because I was so scared to push myself because I knew that the clasping in my back by the time bedtime came would be HORRENDOUS. But he'd notice things like I wasn't hunched over, or I wasn't wincing when I stepped.. and not only did he notice.. but he called me on it. In the slyest of ways, while doing the introduction where he asks how I am I replied with my ridiculous pain level and he'd say almost in monotone "Huh that's weird because when you walked in here I noticed that your posture is quite better than when you first started coming a few weeks ago" and then not only would he proceed with the normal session, but he'd add new exercises or advance ones I was currently getting better at. I was so irritated at first,like how did you even see me Pat? You were working with the last hour's client when I snuck into the showers to rinse off.

But just as observant as he was when I was trying to protect myself from being uncomfortable (and always end up with me leaving feeling more victorious because I had accomplished whatever new addition he had conjured up for the day), he was even more so when I started realizing I was healing and became addicted to pushing myself, even when I shouldn't have. He would notice when I'd say my pain level was nearly gone but yet when I'd stretch I couldn't hold a straight face, and when he asked me about it I explained I was tired of living prisoner to my back pain and just wanted to hurry up and push past it. Pat took a good portion of that session explaining to me how damaging my mindset was, if I continued to push past my body's warning signs I'd cause more damage and potentially put myself out of commission for even longer. It was a hard pill to swallow but he was right. And with that (and the guidance of the other amazing magicians that have helped teach me their trickery of working my body the way it's supposed to) I not only started forcing myself to pace tasks.. I began to enjoy my "down" time and finding tasks to do while I was down (ex. watching movies with Zabrina while I was on the heating pad or when the pain meds would take a little to much of a toll)

Back in December of 2021 I had hit a financial low, I almost lost my car, I couldn't afford diapers, I was constantly having to borrow money from friends and family until pay day just to put gas in my car to make it to my work visits, it was ugly. And the thought of coming up with $10 a session for personal use of the pool so I could progress outside of what my medical insurance was willing to pay was enough to bring me to tears. So I started a Go Fund Me. I didn't actually expect anybody to donate, it was more of a humble myself and admit I can't do this alone move. But to my surprise I was blessed enough to have an amazing squad that came through with enough support to finish me out the year and the first 2 months of 2022 without having to miss a single personal session. When I told Pat just how shocked I was that people were so generous towards me his reply will forever live rent free in my mental space "Well, America loves a Winner" and he continued working with his patient. I sat in the deep end for a couple minutes pondering the fact that he just referred to ME as a winner. This life changing human who inspires and helps fix SOOOO many people.. just classified me as a winner?!? I wanted to stop him and ask for clarification..cleary he didn't mean ME.. I'm no winner, I've never been a winner. I just get lucky sometimes and work way more than I should to make people think I'm something. But in that moment... and every moment since then.. I'm a winner.

I've learned a whole lot about myself in PT, especially about my physical self, and how to operate the one vehicle I'm given for this whole entire road trip called life, but some of the simplest, yet most rewarding, lessons came from Pat. It's because of him that I switched from shoes that were fat girl friendly (flip flops!! No bending over, no tying, no embarrassment!) to shoes that give me proper support and help maintain the correct posture (thank you Nike Air Max's for being SO cute AND functionable). And that simple switch is a game changer.

But most importantly of all.. he taught me how to hold my daughter. I know that sounds silly, but I don't think most people who were outside of my VERY close inner circle knew just how extreme my back had gotten, I couldn't even bend down to kiss her forehead let alone actually pick her up. I expressed to Pat one session just how mentally draining it was that I couldn't lift her, and although he did not advise picking up things that were 30 lbs at the time, he did understand the importance of the action. And he taught me how to stabilize my core, squat down, have her hug me, and make sure to keep my core and glutes tight as I lifted her. It was hard at first but the first time I picked her up... I bawled and never wanted to put her down again, but remember those limits we discussed? Yea , those. Now I wrestle with Zabrina and chase her around play areas, all while keeping my body aligned and my posture correct to help ensure I'm not straining my back more then necessary.

So you're probably wondering why I'm throwing all this Pat background out now, I have a draft I thought I posted awhile ago outlining all the ways he's helped me, but I hadn't asked his permission to use his name in my blog yet so I never got around to finishing it.... On Wednesday Pat moved back to his home state of Mississippi, and even though I'm extremely happy for him and his family, selfishly I would have much preferred he not move and be local to see me through this journey that he helped guide me to.... and because he left.. Pat if you're reading this you're more than welcome to come back and tell me that you don't want to be mentioned in my blog :D Jokes! Thank you though, seriously for everything you taught me, encouraged me, and pushed me to overcome. You literally saved my life and you'll never know just how very grateful I am for you!

The last thing I want to talk about in this week's blog is the products that I have been taking to start this journey off and the amazing effects they have had on not only my health but their part in helping me develop and stick to a new routine.

Isotonix Women's Essentials - This shit is magic. I have religiously stuck to taking them first thing in the morning, 20 minutes before breakfast (which is now a shake I'll talk about in a minute) for the past month only missing one or two days and I've begun to notice some very specific effects.

  • My hair is growing faster and looks FANTASTIC, even before I got it cut, it's way healthier and practically glows when I put a little effort into it.

  • My nails are growing so fast that I got them filled on Tuesday and by Wednesday evening I have noticeable grow out on ALL of my fingers (at first I thought the nail lady might have just done a quick job and didn't fill them all the way until I realized it wasn't just one of my fingers IT WAS ALL OF THEM!)

  • My period was ON TIME, which doesn't happen alot for me and when it does it's normally really brutal. But this time around when the migraine hit.. it wasn't impossible to get out of bed and still be productive, it was bearable and only a mildly irritating.

  • I'm sleeping better! I still struggle to get even 6 hours of sleep, but a lot of that is self inflicted because I tend to either lose track of time or just stay up for "one more project" but now when I finally take my night meds and put my phone up, I fall asleep within a half hour and don't typically wake up

TLS - Protein Shakes -

These things make breakfast SO easy AND actually taste amazing (especially when you add bananas to help with the potassium deficiency). I've made it a habit to start my morning with the Women's essentials, set a timer for 20 minutes, fix Zabrina breakfast (embarrassingly this wasn't something I was able to mentally or physically do every day since my back became so much), put away dishes or clean up something in the kitchen until there's 6 or 7 minutes left on the timer and then throw together a shake. Some days I drink it at home, and a few I was running close on time so I made it to go (I've ran late a time or two in order to allow time to make my shake especially in the beginning as I adjusted to the new routine). I can't honestly tell you if the general feeling of greatness is from the essentials giving my body the nutrients I've been lacking, the fact I'm actually pushing water ALL day, OR the addition of the breakfast shakes... but even on my worst days, I've still been able to accomplish SO much! I'm so thankful I have the means to add these product helpers to my journey <3 As I continue to get more strict on my eating while increasing my physical activity I have no doubts that both the off scale and on scale victories are going to continue to multiply .

I have quite a few people expressing in my journey and would LOVE to be able to help influence everyone who reaches out to help them make life changes and travel this glow up course with me, so I appreciate every e-mail, snap message, piece of fan art (these will all be used in my new digital day planner I'm teaching myself to use), fb message, tiktok like, and text message that you lovely squad members send, please never ever hesitate to reach out if I can make a positive influence on your journey :)


Until next week... Stay hydrated, and Stay humble <3

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